Siri Getting a Brain Upgrade?

Siri has been the kid picked last in gym class for over a decade, but Apple just gave her a protein shake and told her to get in the ring. The project is called World Knowledge Answers, and it’s supposed to turn Siri from “that thing you only use to set timers” into a heavyweight AI answer machine. No more “Here’s what I found on the web” followed by Siri shoving you onto Google’s doorstep like a lazy Uber driver.

Instead, Siri will actually deliver full answers, text, images, videos, and even local info, right there in your face. Apple says it’ll roll out in spring 2026, which means we’ve officially started the countdown to “Siri vs. Everybody.”

Apple has formed a new squad with the very WWE-sounding name “Answers, Knowledge and Information” (AKI). Picture them walking out with pyrotechnics and theme music while holding up a championship belt that says “No More Dumb Siri.” They’re building this so Apple can go toe-to-toe with OpenAI’s ChatGPT, Google’s AI search, and Perplexity, the scrappy rookie that came out of nowhere like an underdog who suddenly started knocking people out.

Here’s the drama: Apple isn’t just using its own muscles. It’s also secretly testing Google’s Gemini and Anthropic’s Claude like a wrestler borrowing someone else’s finishing move. That’s right, Apple is teaming up with Google, the very company it wants to body slam. Frenemies doesn’t even cover it. Google, by the way, is sweating harder than The Rock in a sauna, because if people start “Siri-ing” instead of “Googling,” Google’s ad money pile starts looking like Blockbuster’s DVD shelf in 2010.

OpenAI, meanwhile, is standing on the ropes flexing like “We invented the hype!” Perplexity is bouncing around, yelling, “Look at me, I’m the future!” And Apple just strolls in late like the guy who missed the first half of the party but still walks out with everyone’s attention. This is rivalry at its finest, think Royal Rumble, but instead of folding chairs, they’re swinging large language models.

Why should you care? Because this changes how you ask questions. Imagine yelling at Siri, “How do I unclog this toilet?” and instead of 27 YouTube videos of dudes named Randy telling you to “smash that like button,” Siri just gives you the actual answer. No detours, no ads, no nonsense. Convenient for you, terrifying for every business that relies on you clicking their website to survive.

But here’s the real comedy: Siri has been a running joke for years. We’ve all roasted her. “Call Mom” somehow dials Domino’s. “Set an alarm” ends up setting a calendar event for 2035. And now Apple swears Siri is going to be your all-knowing guru? If this works, it’ll be the comeback of the century. If it doesn’t, well, Siri will go right back to her day job: forgetting what you just said and playing Nickelback when you asked for Nicki Minaj.

Here we are: OpenAI with the spotlight, Google clinging to the throne, Perplexity acting like the cool new kid, and Apple storming in with Siri finally bulked up. It’s less about “who’s smartest” and more about “who controls the answers.” And Apple just slapped its name onto the fight poster.

The question is: in 2026, will you actually say “Siri, it,” or will Siri still be that one coworker who shows up late, says nothing useful, and eats your lunch from the office fridge?

- Matt Masinga